Standing in one’s truth

About a little over a year ago, I went to a seminar on stick and knife fighting at the school where I was taking cardio kickboxing classes.  I fell so completely in love with it (remnants of past lives as a warrior) that I decided to start taking the regular karate classes offered at the school.  I went to several other seminars between last September and May when I moved from PA down to GA, some of which focused on the Kenpo karate I was learning and others which focused on stick and knife fighting as well as a counter-attack system based on a combination of Kenpo karate and a few other types of Filipino martial art systems.

When I first began learning the counter-attack system, we would work drills to help establish muscle memory for different checks and counter attacks.  My instructor emphasized the importance of being very “light” with the drills, not heavy-handed.  This took (and still takes) concerted effort for me as I have a tendency to want to muscle everything.  Yesterday, I attended another stick and knife fighting seminar and was working some knife tapping drills with another student.  Even though I’ve only done this exercise a small handful of times, I seem to have a knack for it; but, I noticed I was having serious difficulty when working with this one other student.  I would go back and switch to working with my friend who was this guy’s teacher and with the man leading the seminar and I had no problems, but for some reason, this other student was different.  And then it hit me.  He was very heavy-handed and not light at all.  His movements felt very muscled, forced, and consequently awkward.  And I noticed that whenever I would work the drill with him, my movements, though starting off soft and fluid, began to mirror his in that they became less fluid, less flowing, more stiff and rigid.  I realized that when I worked with my friend or the seminar instructor, my movements would mirror theirs in feel and energy.

As I continued to process this, it made me think of my every day life and interactions with others and the whole issue of integrating all these different aspects of myself so that I’m not so disjointed in these different areas of my life.  I began to see this pattern of not staying within the energy that I want to embrace when I’m around others who are acting from a very contrary energy.  And I thought of how universal this problem is.  How often do we find ourselves snapping back to someone who snaps at us even though we had initially approached them in a more kindly manner?  How often do we feel ourselves unintentionally creating and operating from a place of negative energy when we are surrounded by it, though that’s not where we usually operate from?  How many times have you begun a discussion with someone, had them become argumentative and found yourself beginning to argue back in the same tone, so very different from your original one?

For me, all of these situations seem to boil down to, How do we stand in the Truth of who we are no matter what?  Is it even possible to do so all of the time?  Does standing in that place mean we never snap at others, never let ourselves stoop to levels of maturity we like to think we’ve grown out of?  Or is the strength in which we stand in that place measured by what we do immediately after we realize we’ve moved outside of it?  My gut tells me the potency and strength with which we stand in our Truth is more so determined by this last question.


5 thoughts on “Standing in one’s truth

  1. 🙂 I agree…Because none of us are perfect, and all of us are subject to stumblings and out and out failures at times.

    The real strength of a person’s character happens in two areas:

    1. When they are given power
    2. When they’ve made a mistake

  2. It is the reason I claim the title of complete idtiot, for I am made perfect by and through my own imperfections.

    Mistakes don’t count. It’s how we deal with mistakes that does. Our RESPONSES are what indicates what’s inside of us.

    As for ‘power’, it is NEVER given, only claimed. What most of us know as ‘power’ is a force of dominance. “My reality is going to dominate yours because that’s what feeds my reality.

    A word of caution if I may…contemplate deeply the perspective of conflict, attack and defense…for these are all concepts of seperation and the return on these radiances is misery to experience.

  3. This is the reason I remove my emotions from my initial responses to conflict … it’s the only way I know how not to respond to anger with more anger.

    Standing in the truth of who and what we are is difficult. The fact that you are questioning and acknowledging the power of this shows how wise you really are.

  4. Grace – absolutely we are all subject to stumblings, and I don’t think I see that as a flaw, more as an opportunity for growth now that I reflect on it more.

    Sue Ann – I love your saying that we are made perfect through our imperfections. I need to sit with that a bit. Concerning your word of caution – yes, I can see how those concepts could lead to separation. This is something that I want to think about more deeply, but my initial thoughts are that separation is not the only approach one could take. Going to sit with that some more, too!

    Tehlanna – There is still something about removing emotion that rubs me the wrong way. I don’t think we should need to do that. This is something I’d like to speak about more with you. My initial thoughts are that we need to better understand from where the emotion is coming, and that greater understanding might mean that we do not need to remove it at all.

  5. This is a very thought-provoking post! Standing in one’s truth means being constantly who we most essentially are, yet it is also important to learn and grow from our experiences and even, maybe especially, our conflicts. How do we do both positively? You offer some very interesting thoughts and images! I’m going to think about this next time I feel myself slipping into someone else’s energy as a result of conflict.

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